New Blog

Hey Guys!

  I decided to start a new blog, this one was getting kind of old, and very very repetitive!  The new one is also on the blogger site here's the address

http://thatsprettywhack.blogspot.com/


  Hops you guys follow me there, thanks for reading!

Jess

Auf Wiedersehen, Sommer

Hey Everyone!

  Summer is over.  It's still August but it's been really chilly and I can just feel that it's over.. and the fall decorations are out on display at the supermarkt here.  I'm happy though, having humidity with no A/C was not fun at all during our 2 months of warm weather here in Tübingen.  I'm looking forward to the leaves changing color and everything too.  It should be gorgeous by the time Steve gets here, so going to Munich is going to be great, and it should be beautiful at Neuschwanstein too! 

I'm ready for vacation!  I basically have the whole month of September as a vacation, besides a couple of days.  The family is leaving for the day and overnight to go to a wedding at a castle north of Stuttgart, and on Monday they leave for Turkey for 14 days.  I do have to drive them at 4 in the morning to the airport, but it's worth it and I'll even do it with a smile on my face the entire way.  They'll come back on the 14th and then Steve gets here on the 19th!  We leave for Munich on the 21st and we decided to stay an extra day since we're not going to Paris, which will give us more time to explore Munich and spend in the tents at Oktoberfest. 

The family also asked me to stay until Christmas.  I told them I'd think about it.. but I'm just thinking of a polite way to say no.  They said no pressure or anything, but yeah right.  I've been here for almost a year like we had agreed.  They're in contact with new nannies and everything, they're just worried because most of them aren't experienced drivers.  In Europe, you have to be 18 to start driving, so  most of them are new.  They're having a hard time finding an American nanny like they had hoped, but maybe they'll get lucky.  I just think that missing two Thanksgivings and two birthdays in a row is too much for me, I was really homesick last year and now I've been really looking forward to  being back home in Virginia.  This is also really unfortunate because my friends in Heidelberg asked me if I could stay with them for a few weeks in November.  Bekah and her husband Chris are both in the Army Active Duty and usually they can both manage to make their schedules work so while one of them is gone, the other is home with their three kids.  In November they're both scheduled to be gone.  They do have ladies on the base that are available to come and stay with kids, but they think that's a bit weird for the kids.  They're also like family to me so I was planning on helping them out and spending some time with their kids, but now that's screwed.  The family is paying for my ticket home, so how would that look if I said no to their request, and then went up to Heidelberg to help out?  I'm sure my friends will understand. 

Anyway, I'm going to take the puppy on a walk and enjoy the rest of the day to myself.  I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Jess

Crappy Friday

...Literally!

Hey Everyone!

It's been a little over a week since I've written a new blog, so here's the update! Isa has been with us for a week and a half and she's doing alright. Having a new puppy around the house is a lot of work, but it's nice too. The new puppy excitement is starting to wear off and I really expected all the puppy responsibilities to be dropped on me, but so far I don't have to take care of it all by myself, which is really really nice. She's doing alright for the most part. She was already being trained to pee out in the grass before we picked her up, so we don't have too many accidents in the house. She's only pooped once, which is nice. Nothing smells worse than dog poop, and farts. She always lets the most horrible smells out when she's asleep cuddled next to someone, and it's bad enough to make your eyes water and cough like crazy! She does have the typical puppy behavior.. like.. jumping, biting/chewing on everything, trying to get into everything, digging in the garden, etc. We went to the pet store and bought a lot of puppy bones for her to chew on and she really loves pig ears and pig stomach lining.. ew. They smell gross and look gross, but if it keeps her from biting my shoes and the furniture, I can deal with it. Potty training a 3 year old and a puppy suck! I feel really bad for the trash can too, more than double the amount of poop now, sick. I already know to hold my breath before I'm 3ft within the garage area. Charlotte has still been driving me crazy too! Thankfully, she went back to daycare/ pre school on Wednesday. I'm just getting really sick of her tantrums and I really really.. REALLY want to get medieval on her butt. Today was the worst it's been in a long time too. When I went into her room to get her dressed, it smelt pretty bad so I asked her if she pooped in her diaper, she said yes, so I told her to come over to the changing table so I could change her, but of course, she started to run around. Her diaper looked like it was ready to explode in any minute, so I had to chase her down quick. She kicked, pulled hair, bit me, pinched me the entire time I was trying to get her on the changing table. Once I had her diaper off, she kept kicking me, and of course, poop got everywhere. On my shirt, my jeans, my neck, my hands, my arms, her legs, her stomach, the changing table, the floor. She kept screaming and kicking the entire time too. She just never stops, ever. I try talking to her calmly a ton of times. I've really gained a lot of patience with this, and I'm happy, but it still doesn't last long with her. Graziella was talking to me about how stubborn Charlotte has always been. I guess she was stubborn as a baby and she does this really weird thing too. She cries and cries when she doesn't get her way, so like most parents do, they left her alone until she stopped. Well she never stops. Ever! She can cry and cry and cry for hours. She said once they said they were going to just leave her alone so she'd get the point. Well she cried for 6 hours. They always give into her because of that. How do you break that?? I feel like I'm talking about breaking a horse in or something haha. It's just nuts. Oh well, only two and a half more months! I hope the weekend is a good one, and no more horrific poop accidents occur either. Have a great weekend everyone!

Jess

Ch-Ch-Changes!

Guten Tag everyone!

It's been awhile since I've written a new blog, we've had a couple changes in the house since I last wrote. On Tuesday, we picked up the family's new yellow lab puppy, named Isa (EEEE-zuh). She is so cute and she learns so fast! I wish she'd stay her size forever though, she's going to be huge when she's full grown, so I'm happy I won't be here for that. It's crazy how Graziella has been with the new puppy too. It's like she swallowed a Care Bear grenade and she's been WAY happy with the dog! I haven't even seen her this affectionate with her own kids! I wish they had picked up a new puppy the day I arrived, that would have been nice. The kids really love her too, so it's nice that they have some of their own new entertainment for a while. I'm not sure when the excitement of a new puppy will wear off though. This week has been kind of hectic. Nicholas left last Saturday to spend some time at his Grandmother's house alone, so Charlotte stayed here. She went to her pre-school/day care on Monday and she's stayed home all week because of the new puppy, it's killing me!! I don't know how mothers live without sending their kids to daycare everyday. Seriously. I don't think anyone should have to spend an entire day with a three year old! When I worked at a daycare center I only had to spend 8 hours with them. Here with Charlotte, I only spend about 4 to 5 hours a day with her. It's been miserable this past week. She has been so jealous of the new attention Isa is getting, so she's been extra cranky and moody. Luckily, Nicholas and Oma came back yesterday and now Charlotte is being entertained by her for a couple days.. whew. Now that Gitmo is being closed, our country should think about sending terrorists to daycare centers all day, I think that would be enough torture for anyone.


Jess

Ich bin glücklich, dass es Freitag ist!

Guten Tag everyone!

Like my subject says, I'm SO happy it's Friday! Friday is always the busiest day of the week for me, but it's also the best. It seems kind of funny that it's the best because most people look forward to no work the next day and having a relaxing weekend. I don't get a relaxing weekend or have it off really, but I still look forward to it anyway. I'm going to be stoked when I actually have days off in the U.S., if my job(s) are scheduled that day, we'll see.

Lately I've been thinking about how much harder things are going to be when I get home. As much as I'm looking forward to going home, I'm dreading it just as much. I'm really looking forward to being with my friends and being back in an English speaking country, but I'll still feel alone. When I moved here my mom already told me that I wasn't allowed to come back to "her house" so I've been prepared for this for almost a year now. My Dad has asked me to come and live with him, but I don't think that's a good idea. He's having a hard time letting go and dealing with me making my own decisions. The Army made him into a control freak so he HATES not having a say in what I want to do. Living with him would only make that worse and I can see it turning into a "my way or the highway" situation and I really don't want that. I've been feeling a little bitter about some of my friends who have it so easy. It really just is jealousy though. One of them has their parents house so he has a place to stay since they moved to VA, one gets to stay home for free, not work and just go to school, one has an apartment her parents pay for and a new car with no job. Blah! I'm going to bust my butt just to make it for the first year. I have been looking into grants and I think I can apply for most of them, and that will help ALOT (thanks to Liberal Politicians!) I've always been a pessimist though so maybe I'm just being down and expecting all the worst things to happen. I'm not afraid of the hard work that's coming my way. I'm really thankful for all the support my friends are giving me and hopefully that will be enough to get me through. That sounds so melodramatic! I guess everyone gets nervous when they take the next step of life.

I'm not sure what's planned for the weekend. I know that a teacher at Charlotte's preschool is getting married tomorrow so they're going to that. I'm not sure if I'm going, I kind of doubt it since I have nothing to wear. I want to talk them into going to Neuschwanstein soon though. It sucks I got stuck with the family who does NO traveling haha. It's only a 3 hour drive away, if we got up early in the morning we could do it easily. I'm planning on taking Steve when he comes to visit in September. I really want to make a trip to Berlin too, but we'll see.

Anyway, I hope you guys have a great weekend!

Jess

P.S. Here is a cute website I found of dachshunds! I want an army of them!

Adorable Dachshunds!!!

I dream.... of Canon

I dream about this camera

I drool over this camera

I want it nooooow

Unfortunately a $549.99 Canon - EOS Digital Rebel XS 10.1-Megapixel Digital SLR Camera
is NOT in my weak budget. I hope to get it by the end of the year though. I got a digital camera from my Dad and Debbie for Christmas and I do love it, but I can't take the pictures I want to take with it. I need to be able to focus and capture light better. P&S cameras are kind of difficult to capture a picture fast, especially with a 5 second delay after you press the button to take it!

I can dream and drool until then...

Very Important Blog

Hey guys,


**Warning: This is kind of a rant, so beware!**

This blog isn't focused on whiny kids or demanding parents for once. I'm just really really mad right now and I need to vent here and give Steve a break :p

All of this irritation started with Facebook. I had a post about watching a TV show and then I got a few comments that kind of irk me. I've changed a lot over the past few years and I'm finally becoming my own person and I'm discovering who I am. I make my own decisions and I don't follow the herd like everyone else does. I've always been free spirited, even with a hardcore Army Dad. I guess I'm starting to discover what I want in life and how I want to live it.

A big change in my life is church. I was raised in the LDS (Mormon) church since I was born. It was very helpful since I moved around a lot with my Dad being in the Army. No matter where we moved, there was always the church and a family like environment in the church, and people to connect with. I loved the social aspect of the church, I've met some of my best friends in it. I honestly have never believed in it. I've never willingly beared my testimony because I never felt that I had one. I always questioned everything. I do have faith, but not in the church. I started thinking more about it when I lived in Virginia. My parents have been strong in the church too. My Dad was raised in it his whole life and eventually converted my mom when she was in High School. I usually went regularly unless I could get out of it, usually by faking sick haha. When I was 15, my stake in VA made a trip up to Palmyra, NY where Joseph Smith (the 1st Prophet and Founder of the LDS church) started it all. Everyone talked about how much they felt the spirit there and how spiritually uplifting it was to be there. I never felt that way and I was actually really mad about it. I prepared myself before the trip, I was ready to be there and in the right mindset. I stopped going to church shortly after that. My Dad left for Iraq and he was really the only one who made sure I went to church. I was 15 and "knew everything" so I didn't listen to my mom either. Once we moved to Georgia, I went a few times again, hoping a fresh start would do some good. It didn't. I stopped going all together and that's just the way it was. I got weird messages from church members with authority too. Before I had my breast reduction, I had to have a talk with a Bishop about my chest size because it was a distraction. My mom thought I was having sex and told someone about it and that got around and eventually I had to have an interview with the bishop. I was supposed to tell him all the details of what I supposedly did. I haven't experienced that yet either. That's really weird and perverted too. It always bugged me that I was supposed to confess my problems like that. If I need guidance and counsel, I'll go willingly to seek it. I don't have to do any of that to repent of my sins. Whatever I do is between me and God, not some perverted Bishop. A lot of the standards bother me too. I'm not turning this into a bash-fest on the LDS Church, don't worry. One thing I have always loved is the moral structure of it. I was pretty much raised by the standards upheld in the church. It did prevent me from making a lot of bad decisions, but now I just think it's because those rules were instilled in me for such a long time too. I'm mostly complaining about the simple standards. No Coke. No Tea. No Rated R movies. No spaghetti strapped shirts. No more than 1 piercing per ear. NO. NO. NO. NO. After awhile I gave into these, and of course I was judged by almost everyone. My former seminary teacher in GA gave me the cold shoulder after I got more than 1 piercing in my ear. I have 7 ear piercings all together by the way. Being shunned is not a good feeling. It seems hypocritical in a way too. The church teaches that people should NOT judge and accept everyone. Well most people don't live by that, but I am grateful for those that do.

Just like this Facebook status! I talked about loving a TV show and BAM! Here come the judgmental comments. I am who I am. Don't call me Ms. LDS. Don't quote a prophet about being CLEAN or True. I am who I am. It really makes me angry. I could even turn green and rip my shirt off. Not really haha, but still, it does frustrate me a lot. I appreciate guidance and support when I need it. But I hate being criticized and judged the most. If I am able to open myself up to someone, they should be happy that I am that comfortable to do so. I respect everyone and their beliefs, even if I don't agree with them. I don't blame the church or anyone with it for anything. I am grateful for a few life-lessons I have learned from the church, but I honestly do not see myself being in it. I can't live my life like that. Things can always change, but now I do not see myself in it. Please do not push your beliefs on me. I wouldn't do the same to you, even if we have different beliefs and ideas.

I don't have a problem with anyone who goes and believes in it.

90% of my family is LDS and for the longest time I hid this from everyone because I didn't want to disappoint them. Disappointing the people I love and care for used to be the biggest fear of mine. I didn't want to be pushed away and judged by them. Well now I am SICK of hiding my thoughts and TRUE beliefs from everyone because I'm afraid of disappointing people. I'm not afraid of that anymore. I'd rather be myself then put up a fake front all the time. So I will be honest in what I believe in.

I do have faith and I do believe in God and in Jesus Christ
I do not believe in Joseph Smith
I do not go to any church regularly
I do not see myself going back any time soon

I watch rated R movies
I have 2-3 cups of coffee everyday
I smoke cigarettes occasionally (yes, I know it's a disgusting habit)
I have a beer or glass of wine occasionally
I plan on getting a tattoo when I'm ready for one

I really hope that any of you who read this can accept me for who I am. It's not all with church either. I don't want to be treated any differently. I'm kind of nervous posting this, but I'm sure I'll feel a lot better once I'm done. I can still be a good person and not follow the herd like everyone else. I'm Jessica Anne Campbell and I'm still the same person. I'm really appreciative of the support I get from my friends and family. Please don't shun me because I don't share the same ideals with you. Thanks for reading this if you stuck around this long. If any of you feel the need to message or talk to me privately, my e-mail address is jeckawecka89@hotmail.com


Jess